Gary, I feel your pain and frustration!
As Mike said, just tell eBay your side of the story.
As for the buyer, well... I actually feel sorry for him. Not because of the mix-up, but because of how he reacted. It must really be a bummer to be such a jerk. He obviously feels someone is always out to get him or he wouldn't have reacted this way. I'd sure hate to be like that...
Bill